Spank what?

I already told this story to about 100 people, but I will put it in writing anyway because every time I think about it I sort of chuckle to myself. Sometimes there will be somebody close by me as I chuckle and they just look at me like I am a little nutty. I guess it is better to look like a happy goofball than a pissed off prick?..... So back to the story-

Last week my kids were sitting at my bar in my basement with me. They were having some Hawaiian punch cocktails as I was having my adult beverage. My Hawaiian punch cocktail is nothing more than fruit juicy red punch and 7up on the rocks. The old ladies COCKtail gets 3 shots of cheap vodka thrown in it! She is always so nice to me after she has two or three of them. However, she was upstairs while I was downstairs with my girls who are usually little angels. After a few of my special kids drinks though they turned into little indians! My six year old was throwing stuffed animals and blocks around as I warned her to stop and get out of my line of sight of the football game that I was watching!!!

Not even 2 minutes after being warned, a block was flung up into the air and hit one of my fancy bar lantern lights that I spent two hours stapling to the ceiling. Even though it was not harmed, I flipped out and told her that she was going to get her ass whooped! My seven year old came to her rescue and said, "aahhh, you said a bad word and I am telling mommy." I said, "ass is not a bad word- look it up in the dictionary, it means donkey." So then she innocently replies, "you're gonna spank her donkey?" I laughed and told her to just go tell on me. Kids really do say the funniest shit.

Love E.