Church Bulletin II

Next Sunday night. There will be a special sermon on "What is Hell". Come early and listen to the Church Choir.

Church Bulletin

There will be a bean supper on Tuesday night. Music will follow the dinner.

Wheel of Fortune

I always thought that Pat Sajak(sp?) was a faggot. The last episode that I just watched he confirmed that feeling. There was this one puzzle that the answer was- Hugh Jackson as Wolverine. And Pat says, "And I am Pat as Gerbal." How gay was that? He always thinks that he is so funny that I think he was just trying to be funny and came across as a Homo!

Oh well, I knew that I should've just watched Trebek!!!!!!!!!

Jay Leno

The winners of the superbowl each got $82,000 & the losers each got a new Toyota.

Not in the mood. Excuses and Comebacks to those excuses.

Here is my top ten list. I could've probably made a top 20 list, but I will stick to some of my favorites.

10. I got a headache(classic)*********** I don't wanna fuck your head!

9. I'm really not in the mood********** I'm in the mood enough for the both of us!!!

8. My monthly friend is visiting******* Cool, sounds like a threesome in the making!

7. My back is hurting************** I don't wanna fuck your back!

6. I'm not taking off my clothes, it is cold in here!***Did I ever tell you how pretty your mouth is?

5. I got a real heavy flow.***** Kiss my grits, sounds like a bloody threesome!!

4. I' m very gassy. *** I got a stick of dynamite, lets try to blow up the couch!!!

3. I did not take a shower.**** Thats fine, I planned on stinking you up anyway!

2. You drank to much and you will take forever!*** Baby, you're so hot, you know that is not true! I love you so much, you are so awesome! A great person, mom, wife and person! I would do anything for you because you are so awesome! And Hot! Come on Baby, lets make sweet love! You are awesome!

1. I got lots of stuff to do.***** That shit can't wait for 5 minutes? JUST FUCK ME ALREADY!!!

I should send this top ten list into the Letterman show!

E.H

Just the damn wholesale club!!

My wife yells to me from the other room- Hey do you wanna go to BJ's before the kids get home from school? I got so excited that I almost crapped myself! Turns out that I did not hear the whole question in its entirety and thought that she was asking something else!!!

I was a little upset after my queen explained to me that she just wanted to go for soap and paper plates and she was not interested in pleasing my ding dong. I told her that I am spending $40 a year to shop at that wholesale club and that maybe somebody should be sucking my big D.D.!!!

Sincerely, E.H